sixillusions | [catchall] Kate

[ well... at some point she'll find an opportunity to awkwardly approach. ]

Kanda... um. Is it okay if we talk for a little bit?

[He left her alone on Sunday because he is himself, but he's not actively avoiding her, so he's all that hard to find, really. He favors the same types of places he did before--away from the crowds whenever he can manage it, and often in outdoor areas with lots of trees and such.

She can find him in one of those places, finishing a cup of tea he brought from the mall. He looks over as she approaches, but it's not emotionshare anymore, so it's hard to tell how he's feeling.]

What?

[ well... she'll come over to face him, and then bows deeply. ]

... I want to apologize for my actions.

[It's not surprising--and despite his conflicted feelings, he isn't so vengeful that he wants to take his frustrations out on her. It's harder when it's personal, but he knows she wasn't in control of herself any more than Aqua, or Nona, or their countless other killers. And he's seen precious people lose control of themselves before. He believes in the diligent, caring, respectful Kate that he saw at the house for all those weeks, not the one who attacked him.

Besides, even if he did want to hold a grudge, what could he do about it? Kill her once, just to make it even? Not only is he not that type of person, but it wouldn't even be satisfying. She's not a fighter. (He'd be over it all by now if she was.) And with their new information, hypocritically, he's demanding that others join them here--calling for their deaths, even if he's forcing himself not to think of it that way.

No--it's difficult, and a little frustrating, but he can redirect his anger to the cult, where it truly needs to go.]

You're fine now. The monster's gone. [That's what's most important.] And the guy--Nehan says we're not dead. So... going back won't really be a revival. It's just leaving this dimension. [That's what's most important to him.

...

After a moment, and with great reluctance, because he's still as terrible at communicating and having emotions as ever:]

Thanks for telling him.

[He doesn't know if Kate knew about Lavi and Laudna's plans--but he is glad she got to go out that way: gently granted peace and freedom, not trapped mid-rampage like a beast.]

[ she waits for him to say what he has to say before lifting her head. ]

... I see.

I was afraid you'd be angry.

[WELL...]

I was. [...No, okay, he can give her a little bit more than that.] I am. I hate having my head fucked with.

[He's more mad about that than the actual murder part tbh]

But we're both here now, so it doesn't matter anymore. If we can get out of here and crush this cult, that'll be enough.

... Ah. I'm very sorry for that. I think I would hate that, too.

[ technically, the monster did fuck with her head. but still. ]

Then, I will focus on that as a way to make amends.

[He's certainly not going to discourage her, since he thinks she's perfectly able and competent in her own ways, but given the warnings he's received--]

Don't do anything stupid.

[PLEASE DON'T CHARGE INTO THE FOG IN AN ATTEMPT TO MAKE UP FOR SERIAL KILLING AND DIE FOR REAL HE DOESN'T WANT THAT

But otherwise--]

For now, we need to get as many of the rest of them over here as possible. It sounds crazy, but they don't have a lot of time to think about it. So try to help us convince them.

[Truly ironic that by the time they figured out Kate's crimes it would've been better to let her go on a killing spree and only take her out at the last minute]

... I won't.

[ warmly. relieved that he would say such a thing. ]

They may be safer here, but there will be five who remain. What will happen to them? If they're sacrificed...

[ a little smoke rising from her head at that. ]

[He sighs, irritated.]

We should try to only leave one or two people over there, at most. [He knows that people fixated on "just under 6" to minimize cult suspicion, but he'd rather take the risk and get as many people out as possible.] If we're careful with the timing, the cult won't be able to do anything about it.

[As for the ones left behind, though... he doesn't have anything comforting to tell her. He doesn't know how to help them, either. From his point of view, it's very likely that they'll be sacrificed.

He should probably tell her that, the same way he'd told her, well-meaning but blunt as always, that she'd have to make a choice. But instead, he sits for a minute, quiet.]

...People think that the weird, creepy things people keep taking from that room are necessary for the ritual. If they don't have it, they might not be able to do it.

[It's not much--it's not even real hope, as far as he's concerned, but. It's the only thing he can think of to offer her.]

Oh...

[ there's just more smoke. she is considering it, but she knows it's a slim hope. ]

We can encourage them to come over here, but I'm worried about leaving the last few people so vulnerable... Lavi and Alfyn had their hands full last weekend dealing with a monster, and I hate to think of what would have happened if they weren't there.

Yeah. They're lucky none of them died like that other woman.

[He doesn't remember Ishtar's name but he does remember her death... I think it would be funny if we just saw an uptick in off-schedule deaths for endgame and people just stumble into the graveyard dazed and confused

But he is... tentatively... going to believe that they're smart enough to leave at least one fighter. He's not a naturally optimistic person, and he doesn't have a ton of faith in their collective intelligence, but he does think that they care enough about each other that they aren't going to abandon, like, Laudna and Camille to fend for themselves.]

Ishtar.

[ quietly offers the name. kanda pls. ]

... I suppose that in the end, we can give them as much information as possible, and they'll have to make the best decisions they can with that.

It sounded like the people at the haunted house were already catching on to what will need to happen, when we last discussed as a group.

[STOP LISTEN he's done so well all game. There are so many people here. Why do you all have names.

But he nods, at that, unsurprised. He didn't always attend the group meetings, but he was certainly told of them afterward.]

We have to wait for them, now.

[Which kind of sucks, but. It is what it is. Like she said--all they can do is pass on what they know. It's up to the living to make use of it.]

... Yes.

It's hard, to be so powerless to affect things.

[ and she imagines it's harder for kanda, who may not always choose to be involved, but would surely act wherever he felt it necessary.

kate is somewhat used to having to wait and see how things pan out, stressful as it is. ]

...I know.

[She's right; it's something he's struggled with since they got here and they realized there was nothing to do but sit around and wait to die. Kanda doesn't need to be a savior or a hero--despite his attitude, he's perfectly capable of working with a group or letting others take charge. But he gets frustrated and restless when there's nothing he's capable of available to him.]

[catchall] Kate

Week 6, Monday

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